Failed Medical Check-up

Not a MC again...Medical Check Up...brokes my heart.

10.14am - Tuesday-05-06-2010

I received a call from Citigroup HR people, apologized for not getting me hired in their 'family'. I was really speechless and listen with sad. With all things in my mind, I was not really consent with what they said, I was really feel unfair and jeopardized myself.
I know I am under medication with Hypertension, but is it really so bad to encountered for? I ask politely to Lina.
I am really guessing myself. Do I really bad with the Hypertension title. Which limit my future to hold? Which may regards as a 'bad luck'? Or anything name given for bad things.

I take deep breath and keep myself calm and pray for that whole day to 'Please Allah gives me a bravery to still hold the truth, You know what is Good for me in front of me, back., and side'

'Please..and please beyond me to off-limit this all kind'.

Is Medical Check up is really a good choice for the pre-employment act. In my case, I don't know. Maybe they wont think to insured the hypertension employer in future.

All this is sick for me.

Lina, I know she kind of trying telling me to the tip of the iceberg, and make me understand that the working condition may not welcoming a hypertension 140/80.

Or did I make wrong by giving a clause I am under medication.

However, I still gratefull I am lovely girl who really strong. (Do I?)
I just cry and sit on my Pray Mat - As I know He is judging me.
But, Really I hope I dont want this. Could it be any best offer and good after this.
And Citygroup just brokes my heart. I already in high aim with this company.
I didnt mad at anyone or anygroup even to any company or life.
Just I feel sad for me. I feel I make myself sucks for this. But I know I shouldnt said this.
So, I write.

With every hopes is just for mom. And this I am not ready to tell her yet.

I will having tomorrow interview with Sime Darby. I am a good Hypertension and cherish worker. I know.

Wish me luck. =(